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People come to the role of caregiver with little notice or preparation. It may feel like your familiar role as daughter, son, mother, father, etc., gets uprooted and replaced by the position of caregiver. Your time becomes an offering to the care of someone else. Your life no longer feels like your own.
I can help you gracefully transition into the complex role of family member and caretaker. By referencing your deep knowledge of your loved one, we’ll raise important questions and identify key decision points. Caretaking is difficult and often confusing. You don’t have to go it alone.
I’ve worked with families of all kinds. Serious, quirky, fraught, stubborn, or bewildered. All families face similar challenges as they navigate a loved one’s transition. It’s helpful to bring in an outside voice to help plan, prioritize, and guide.
When I arrive, I come bearing listening ears and tenderness for your family.
Questions
what if I don’t want to do this!!?
When a life-limiting illness is diagnosed, it can feel like the floor beneath your entire community has fallen away. Life becomes a maze. Roles may reverse, unexpected fears may surface, truths that used to exist don’t make sense anymore, and everyone is trying to return to normalcy. But what if “normalcy” doesn’t bring peace? What if peace is brought on by meaning, presence, and mutual care? When these values become prioritized, the ideas of roles, responsibilities, and obligations begin to fade. Love just becomes love.
Meeting daily needs while helping your loved one gracefully pass can feel impossible. In reality, it is an immense gift that is yours to give. Let me help you navigate this new terrain and remain grounded, present, and whole. When you’re whole, you can be wholly present for the dying.
I’m a caregiver. Why seek an end of life doula?
The passing of your loved one is a sacred time for everyone involved. Who’s caring for you? The best care for your loved one must include your well-being. We’ll create a plan for what mutual care looks like. Together we’ll find answers to any decisions in your path – including healthcare, home care, safety, legacy planning, and after-death decisions. You’ll have a safe space to ask questions about the care you want to offer your loved one and, more importantly, what good caregiving looks like for you. As an end of life doula, I’m here to help everyone involved in a loved one’s passing.
How does this work?
First, we’ll meet and talk. Here are some of the things we might discuss.
- Important decisions around your loved one’s care (healthcare, hospice, quality of life, after death care)
- How do you want to spend this time?
- Education on the dying process
- Safety, positioning, daily care
- Advocating for your loved ones’ decisions
- Creating a peaceful space and vigil
- Family dynamics/decisions
- What does quality care look like for you?
See what people are saying
Do we need an end-of-life doula? What essential skills do they bring to the table? Do we want to bring a stranger into such an intimate private moment for the family? Is Erika the right person for the job, assuming we need one? These are all questions I asked myself before we engaged with Erika.
Most people you ask would like to pass peacefully at home surrounded by loved ones as they draw their final breath. It’s a romantic notion, but does it play out that way?… read on >
Doug
California, UKIt’s hard to describe exactly what Erika gave to our family, as it was all so intuitive and seamless that we hardly noticed. What I can say without any understatement is that without her calming and loving presence there is no doubt in my mind that my amazing Mum’s passing would not have been as beautiful as it was.
It had been a complicated process to get us all to where we were that week…. read on >
Stephen
London, UKReady to start?
Simply email me at [email protected]. I’d love to hear more about what you’re experiencing and see if I’m a good fit to help.
A loved one’s time at the end of life is often full of uncertainty and worry. You’re stressed, tired, and not sure you’re providing the proper care. You’ve been thrust into the role of caretaker and have to make decisions you never anticipated. You want to spend time with your loved ones, but paperwork, phone calls, and regular life get in the way.
The burdens on you as the caretaker are many. They wreak havoc with your emotions and mental state at a time when you want to be fully present and mindful. That’s why I became an end of life doula – to help you take a step back and be present with your transitioning loved one.
When we work together, you’ll develop a care plan that respects the wishes of your dying loved one and that fulfills your desire to give the best care possible while considering you in the care as well. Once your plan is in place, you’ll have confidence in your decisions and create meaningful time with your family member.